canon, before DYING
On a day when ‘that special someone’ was stricken from my lexicon, I wouldn’t have thought I’d be betrayed by my $1,000 consort. But she failed me, and now my children have another in a growing list of expensive former gadgets-cum-toys.
My digital SLR, after three years of faithful service, has gone blind.
In a series of events reminiscent of Mary losing her sight in Little House on the Prairie, I sat by helplessly as my Canon, known fondly in my household as ‘Trust Fund,’ rapidly deteriorated. At first, the symptoms were mild, but annoying. The Automatic Focus function stopped FUNCTIONING with my 300 mm. Shortly thereafter, the AF failed to move even the factory 18-55 mm.
By the time we returned home from Victoria, even Manual Focus ceased to exist as a meaningful concept.
In an ironic twist of fate, my iPod Nano, incapable of holding a charge for more than 18 seconds at a time since the first week I got it, decided now would be the right time to go to work. Perhaps it was jealousy? I have made it clear that if my senses were children, I would gladly sacrifice hearing for sight, and as much as Apple has endeavored to endear its product to the nation’s family of consumers, compared to a digital canon, an iPod is little more than a 17-year-old foster kid who spends his first week in your home selling your grandmother’s jewelry for malt liquor and cloves.
Still, it’s not like I’m completely ungrateful.
Remember when the two dogs, worth approximately two grand in 1999 dollars, in Where the Red Fern Grows die horrible deaths only to be replaced by a five buck (in 1929 dollars) plant? And this is somehow enough to ease everyone’s suffering? Well that’s a close enough analogy, I suppose, to my $1,000 camera dying, replaced by a $150 mp3 player that I got for free.
And as the following images reveal, a blind $1,000 camera still sees better than a $4 disposable 35mm.
BARELY.
A sunflower. Clearly. Or an ovary. SAME DIFFERENCE.
A view of my backyard. At noon.
We live in the PAC NW, so obviously the occasional black bear will wander into our yard.
My son. Relaxing as he is wont to do on the divan.
My mother-in-law, a pensive moment, dreaming of the homeland, no doubt.
Alex. Wearing a veil for some reason. Clearly, she's taking the death of the Canon as hard as anyone.
Me. In one of the few self-portraits I actually like.
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