I’ve developed several themes over the past year that define this site, along with a few phrases that I would hope would bring me to mind (cue the ducks, memes come here to die, VTF). This site is about childhood memories, parenthood, love, sex, songs from the 80s, unhealthy habits, Romania, firefighting and what an idiot I am. It’s about regret, remorse and the elegance of longing. It’s about writing intoxicated. I wish I could be funnier than I was, but trying to pick 12 posts that define this site has helped me realized that I’m a fairly dour and depressed blogger. These are the 12 entries that I think provide a good cross-section of these themes, in case you’re new here.
1. Interstate Love Affair
I do this from time to time, starting off serious, but ending in a ridiculous manner. It’s a sickness, really. It’s also one of the first posts I used Alex’s (somewhat stylized, I admit) Romanian accent.
2. Ways of Breathing
I’ve been teased a little because of always jumping back and forth between different time periods. I admit, it’s probably a little much for something as unimportant as a blog, but I’ve gotten so used to it by now, I’m afraid I can’t go back. This is a firefighting post based on two of my more memorable calls. I adapted it for a speech I gave later on that worked well.
3. Baby Birds
Back in September I started turning off comments for posts that were a little too painful. Childhood can be a bitch. I try to make posts as short as possible and get in the imagery I need, and I think this example worked for me.
4. Big Me, little me
This one is hard for me to read, and I admit way too sentimental and affected. I loved Scott’s comment. Writing this really helped me remember the two days referenced here, the last day I spent with my grandfather, and the day I visited his grave a couple of years later. And it helped me come to terms with a little of the anger I was holding. Gah. Yes, fine, I’m drunk.
5. Taking Turns
I started to hurt a few feelings in the family by sharing some things that probably shouldn’t be shared. But the point of this post was not to hurt anyone else, but rather illustrate my superhuman ability for doing the same things I complain about.
6. Kansas City Terminal
Alex went to Romania earlier in the year and I was miserable and lonely the whole time. I wrote her several letters during this time, and read these to her for our anniversary. I picked a restaurant that turned out to be absolutely horrid. But the letters made her cry, so it wasn’t so bad.
7. French Lessons
I’ll never be an A-lister if I continue to do memes, but I can’t help it. I see it as a challenge to put a little spin on them. And anyway, I kill ‘em.
8. Fortress and Castle
Another experimentation with time travel, trying to connect the past with the present.
9. Honey Feathers
I think this might be the point where I really started to concentrate on creating lines I could remember. Before this point, I think blog posts only took 10 to 20 minutes. Nowadays it takes me damn near an hour. Less’n I’m drunk.
10. Seeing What She Sees
Okay, I still have somewhat of a sense of humor.
11. Mexico
I don’t write poetry, but this is about as close as I come to the attempt.
12. Lion's Tooth
I think this is the post that defines me.