The Comment Orgy is now officially over. The guests have departed, some to acquire penicillin shots, others to explain to their bosses why images of Nude Jude adorn their browser history files. My head aches, my fingers are hopelessly cramped shut, and I’m swearing to never do this again. Seriously, I was emailing Patricia about having her host the next Comment Orgy, and then having her pick the subsequent host, but being as how she’s a respected blogger and I’m a Comment Whore, I may only be adding to my own humiliation.
Still, we need to do this again. We should do this again.
Just not here.
Intuitively, I know people who receive massive amounts of correspondence cannot really respond to each note. Every now and then I leave a comment on a site, and even though the person might have 300 other comments to sift through, I still feel a slight pang when my comment goes unacknowledged. I return to the comments box as subsequent notes start to insulate my own, pushing it ever forward towards the forgotten middle.
And I hate to think that anyone has ever come here and felt that way. The karmic implications terrify me.
I haven’t written a post since Wednesday, and that frightens me even more. I have at least a dozen posts in development, but being in an ironic state of ‘woe-is-me-see-how-everyone-likes-me’ mode has ground the machinery to a halt.
This kind of guilt is molasses. It’s sweet to the ego, but leaves you immobile.
Kassi asked if I still encouraged people to write hateful things. OH GOD YES PLEASE DO. Allow me to cast the first stone. Here, watch as I take the awkward stance of attempting to throw the rock directly overhead, hoping it will fall back true and hit the mark:
“you have got to be fucking kidding me. you blabber on about being a comment whore, practically beg for attention, and then you get 100 comments and have the balls to complain about it? and then follow up with some kind of sob story about how you can’t deal with being so popular? woe-is-me is fucking right. get over yourself. bitch.”
Ahh! Now THAT felt good!
Okay, now who’s gonna design the ‘Comment Orgy’ button?
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